ABOUT ME

I'm just your average lizard person living in the modern age. Dodging cryptid hunters and trying to understand human interactions. Why do you always scream when you see me and follow me with cameras? It's rude... You know that, right? Anyway, I've been writing all my millennia-long life and, lately, I've decided to do something about it. That "something" is publishing my first book!

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But enough about me, here's some more about me instead! I have an extensive education, including graduating from the prestigious Grammar Nazi University (after a brief hiatus foolishly pursuing a certificate from the insurrectionist "Language is Arbitrary" club) and earning my PhD as a Doctor of Philosophy (my PhD PD) under my beloved advisor Diogenes. My hobbies include people watching (while they're safely inside their cages), sunbathing, shedding my old skin, and calculating the time until the Earth's sun explodes. Though we do live in a dystopia (at least those of us in developed countries), let's not forget to be thankful! So, go outside, look up, and welcome the sun's poison rays into your genes. Never forget that what doesn't kill us makes mutants in the eyes of society!

 

I hope you enjoy my book and look forward to the ones to come!